


The Beginning

by Torutaka10969



Series: Bedroom Warfare [3]
Category: ONE OK ROCK
Genre: Cheating, M/M, Smut, don't come for me, it's all fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:42:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26996884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Torutaka10969/pseuds/Torutaka10969
Summary: How Ryota and Taka ended up in the mess they're in
Relationships: Kohama Ryouta/Morita Takahiro
Series: Bedroom Warfare [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1908892
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This is smut and nothing but smut. A pre-quel to The Last Time.

Taka wasn't sure what city they were in, let alone where they would be tomorrow. All he knew was that he was exhausted and his throat was raw from singing. He crawled into the hotel bed and stared at the empty bed opposite him. Trying to remember where Ryota had said he was going, but his sleepy mind drifted off, begging him to finally sleep. 

Taka's eyes fluttered open as he heard someone say his name softly. He looked up and saw Ryota, holding a cup of tea. 

"You mentioned your throat was hurting so I got you a tea" Ryota said quietly, feeling bad that he had accidentally woken up the vocalist. When Taka sat up, Ryota sat down on the older teen's bed. 

Taka played with the warm cup in his hand, taking sips as he stared at the tinged liquid inside. The liquid warm on his throat as he finished it, placing the empty cup back on the bedside table and turning his attention to Ryota. "How are you holding up?" 

Ryota shrugged. His entire body ached. Muscle sore from overexertion. Brain fuzzy from exhaustion, fingers were covered in painful blisters from his bass strings. Everything was on fire. Before he could fully respond to Taka, he noticed Taka sitting up, positioning his legs around his waist. Smaller hands rubbed against his shoulders and he let out a soft sigh of appreciation. 

"You should get those back patches…" Taka noted. His own back was sore, but it didn't feel anywhere near as sore as Ryota's did. Every single one of his muscles felt like it was knotted. The involuntary sighs and groans from Ryota was just another indication that the other man was in pain. He could even feel the muscles tense underneath his thumbs when Ryota turned around and faced him. Their faces were close, the smell of cigarettes on Ryota's breath blew in Taka's face as the bassist thanked him. His heart fluttered in a weird way, brushing it off as not usually being this close with Ryota. 

The silence was loud. Taka felt as if his heart beating rapidly was the only sound in the room, with the exclusion of Ryota's occasional grunts. Smiling down at the bed underneath them, he was overtaken by a sense of gratitude for the band. How lucky he was to have been stalked by Toru all those years ago. Now, they were recording their third studio album while promoting the second. 

And it was exhausting to Ryota. Mentally as well as physically. Thanking the vocalist again for the massage, he laid down on the bed. Not realising - or not caring - that the bed he was lying on was Taka's. Getting underneath the covers, he suddenly noticed Taka was also there. Both of them broke out into a fit of giggles, realising Ryota's mistake. Just as Ryota was about to admit defeat and go to his own bed, a soft hand was on his shoulder. Pleading eyes met his own. 

"Don't leave me" Taka said quietly. 

"Of course, I'd never leave you" Ryota smiled assuredly, laying back down next to Taka. He felt Taka hug onto him and hugged the other man back, holding his delicate body in his arms. They were close, he could feel Taka's breath on his cheek. The smell of green tea was strong on Taka's breath as they stared at each other. 

Taka wasn't sure what was going through his mind. Whether it was due to the exhaustion or his need for physical comfort, he couldn't stop staring at Ryota's lips. How they curled up slightly at the edges, the 5 o'clock shadow forming, the perfect cupid's bow. Something took hold of him, their faces already close together, and rested his forehead against the other man's. Both staring at each other, eyes searching for something to explain this closeness between them. 

Ryota smiled back at Taka, who was still lying in his arms. Enjoying the closeness of the other man. Slowly, he inched forward, closing the space between them until their lips were touching. Brushing gently against the vocalist, then immediately pulling away in confusion. What were they doing. He had never felt like this towards the other one, ever. But the confused look on Taka's face as they made eye contact again made very clear what Taka was thinking. 

And then Taka made very clear what he was thinking, pulling Ryota back into a bruising kiss. Fireworks sparking inside of him with each brush of their tongues. He wanted more of this, more of Ryota. Pushing the already shirtless man onto his back, Taka took control of the situation as they melted into the kiss together. He felt hands on his hips, steadying them and then moving up, underneath his shirt, pulling it off completely before being pulled into another passionate kiss. 

Time seemed to pass in a blur of kisses and soft touches. Next thing Ryota knew, they were both naked and out of breath, smiling at each other as they caught up their breathing. Wondering how they ended up here, where they were going and what it all meant. Probably nothing, Ryota thought to himself. It wouldn't be the first time either of them had hooked up with someone who was just a friend. A quick fuck to relieve stress and get it out of their systems. But then Taka leaned over, whispered into Ryota's ear, and he wasn't so sure. 

"Make love to me" 

It was followed by a signature fit of Taka giggling at his own joke. But for a second, it had Ryota. Slapping the vocalist's back, Ryota laughed as well. "I'll make something to you" 

"Don't threaten me with a good time" Taka continued laughing before catching Ryota up in another searing kiss. Holding onto the others hands, fingers intertwined as he held them down against the bed. Kissing his neck as Ryota moaned helplessly underneath him. 

"Did you bring condoms?" Ryota asked suddenly, seeming to catch Taka off guard. 

Taka sat up, pausing to think. Straddling Ryota's hips, theri dicks hard against each other. Were they really about to have sex? Taka gulped, he wanted this but he was terrified. Soon, Ryota sat up, holding his waist and kissed him again gently. He wanted this so badly. Biting on his lip he shook his head, he hadn't expected to get any while on tour. "I do have lube though" 

"That works" Ryota murmured, pulling Taka back down onto the bed and took him into another bout of passionate kisses. He was also terrified, he knew nothing of having sex with another guy. But something inside of him wanted to try with Taka. It felt right, warm and safe between Taka's arms as they continued exploring each other. 

Ryota watched as Taka reached over for the night table, revealing a bottle of lubricant that Taka was playing with. Beginning to question how Taka knew exactly what he was doing, expertly lubricating himself as if he had done this thousands of times. Suddenly, Ryota wasn't sure. Maybe Taka had had sex with other guys before. It wasn't a thing he ever thought to ask the vocalist. "Do you know what you're doing?" 

"I've only done this once before, with a girl, so no. Not really" Taka laughed nervously before guiding Ryota back onto his back and spreading the bassist's legs. 

Ryota relaxed as he felt Taka enter him. Holding each other closely, sharing gentle kisses as they both adjusted. A feeling of fullness that he never knew he could feel took over him. It felt nice, being this close to Taka, the soft kisses, gentle moans involuntarily escaping both of them. 

Taka smiled down at Ryota, giggling together as they enjoyed the moment between them. Not bothering to think of what this would mean for their friendship, all Taka cared about was making Ryota feel good. Each touch turned him on more, each sound that escaped Ryota's mouth inspired him to continue. 

Ryota snaked his arms underneath Taka's shoulders. Burying his face into Taka's neck, he had no idea that this would feel so good. Biting down on Taka's neck, the pressure inside of him was building. Pleasure overcame his senses, each time Taka hit something deep inside of him. Unable to articulate how it felt, all he could do was cry out Taka's name repeatedly. 

Taka moaned. Each trust brought another cry from Ryota, and brought Taka closer to completion. Looking down at the bassist below him, Taka smiled. Tucked a strand of hair behind Ryota's ear. He was so beautiful like this, sweaty and needy. Pressing their lips together once again, Taka slipped his tongue into Ryota's mouth. 

Ryota cried into the kiss, pulling Taka closer to him as he got closer and closer to his peak. Sparks ran through his veins with each touch, the feeling in his groin growing stronger as Taka sped up the thrusts. Throwing his head back onto the pillow, he let out a long moan as he was pushed over the edge. Looking up at Taka, they both smiled as they finished together. 

Taka smiled, nuzzling his nose into Ryota's neck as he pulled out. Resting onto Ryota's chest, the other man loosely wrapped his arms around his back. Still high on post-coital bliss, Taka giggled as they both cuddled up, getting comfortable together. 

Ryota lazily let his fingers trace drawings over Taka's skin. The feeling of closeness with the vocalist was nice, it wasn't what he was expecting from tonight but he did enjoy the outcome. Pulling the covers over both of their naked bodies, he closed his eyes and fell asleep. 

\---

Ryota went through the day with a smile on his face. He noticed Taka also seemed happier today. Rejuvenated and less stressed. They hadn't actually addressed the events of last night, but Ryota knew it wasn't serious. Just a bit of stress relief between bandmates. 

Taka sat in a meeting with the entire band and their management. His mind wandered over to the bassist across from him. Catching Ryota's eye, they both smiled, recalling the night before. It was their own secret, and Taka could barely wait to have a chance to do it again. 

Immediately after the meeting finished, Ryota grabbed Taka's arm, claimed they had to discuss the bassline, and dragged him to a supply closet. Ryota knew Toru probably didn't believe that explanation, but he didn't care. All he could think about was Taka. 

Taka giggled, following the man to the closet and immediately being dominated by kisses from him. They were rough and passionate, desperate for something else. His back was pushed against the wall, he knew Ryota wanted this as much as he did. 

Hands brushing against skin, clothes quickly forgotten on the floor beneath them. Desperate for each other, Ryota quickly picked Taka up and placed his back against the wall. Pushing inside of him as Taka let out a loud, low moan. Ryota giggled, covering Taka's mouth with his own as he swallowed Taka's noises. 

Taka pushed his head back against the wall. He felt full, warm and safe between Ryota's arms. Melting into the feeling of his bandmate inside him, it was the most amazing feeling he had ever experienced. The thrusts were no longer painful, but welcome as he shuddered with the new feeling inside him. 

Ryota kissed Taka's forehead, melting between the hot kisses from the vocalist. His fingernails were digging into his back, desperate for release as they both grinded against each other. Pushing further and further inside of him, the moans from Taka pushing them both over the edge. 

Taka let out a final moan, loud as it echoed through the supply closet. Ryota followed closely after, holding the other man in his arms as they giggled together and shared small kisses. Taka could do this forever, he thought, resting his head against Ryota's shoulder as they both caught up with their breathing. 

Ryota brushed Taka's hair as he placed him on the floor afterwards. Smiling together, they both giggled. Ryota only wished that he could spend time with Taka. But Taka was quick to give him a kiss on the forehead and then leave the closet, instructing him to wait a few minutes. He felt strangely empty. Trying not to think too much of why he felt this way, he just waited 5 minutes before exiting and joining the rest of the band. 

\---

The sex continued, every rehearsal was another opportunity for Taka and Ryota to find a private place for them to get out their stress. Each time though, Ryota felt a small pit in his stomach. Growing each time Taka would leave the closet first. He'd stand there, alone, waiting a few minutes so no one else would see them. It felt like a dirty secret. Like he was the dirty secret. 

Getting off the bus, Ryota was itching to finally be able to corner Taka into a hotel room and pounce on him. Instead, he was greeted by learning there had been a mix up and he was sharing a room with Tomoya tonight. 

"It's not really a big deal, right?" Toru shrugged it off, going into the room he was sharing with Taka. 

"Yea, not a big deal" Ryota nodded in agreement, entering the next room over. Laying on the bed, he felt defeated and stressed. The pit in his stomach grew deeper as he readied himself for bed. He shouldn't feel this way. He knew he shouldn't feel this way, it was wrong. But something deep inside him had stopped thinking of Taka as just a casual fuck. Somehow, over the years they spent between sheets and in empty closets, he had started developing feelings for Taka. He liked the way Taka would fall asleep in his arms, face nuzzled into his neck. The smiles that Taka would always give him when they caught each other's eye. An unspoken promise of what would always come. He enjoyed Taka's company, the long rambling conversations they would have in hotel rooms, about their hopes and dreams for the future as a band. How his eyes twinkled, the moles next to his lips. 

He liked Taka. 

Turning over in his bed, Ryota was terrified. How would Taka react? Would Taka feel the same way? Would Taka decide their arrangement was no longer working? 

Groaning to himself, Ryota stared at the wall. This wasn't good, none of this was good. Cursing himself silently, he sighed heavily and stared out the window. Wondering how Taka was handling the stress tonight, if he was using Toru to relieve stress. 

The thought made the pit in his stomach grow deeper. Thinking of Taka hooking up with someone else. It was beyond wrong, he knew Taka was allowed to hook up with whoever he wanted. But just the mere thought of him hooking up with someone else, let alone his best friend, was the worst thing imaginable. 

Groaning again, Ryota closed his eyes. Hoping that maybe the feelings would go away in the morning. 

\---

It was their first tour in europe. A whole month of concerts, and they'd be in a new city almost every night. A new hotel regularly. Ryota got to the hotel for the night, he had no idea where they were or what day it was. All he knew was that for tonight, his roommate was Taka. 

Immediately, Taka put his suitcase on the bed near the door. There was no way they were actually going to use both beds. Giggling, he pushed Ryota backwards onto the bed near the window. He knew they didn't have time for sex before sound check, but he still wanted the kisses before heading to the venue. 

Ryota pushed his arms under Taka's shirt, still laughing as they had a quick romp around the sheets before hearing a knocking on the door. Groaning, Ryota gave Taka one final kiss before they both got up and found Toru and Tomoya at the door. 

Following the other two to sound check, Taka felt a weird feeling in his stomach. When they started out, it was purely sex. He would have never even thought to initiate intimacy unless he knew they would get to have sex. But now, he didn't oppose sharing small kisses with Ryota without any promise of anything else. Taka tried not to dwell too hard on it, thinking too much about their situation always hurt his head too much. 

\--

"No, the bass line should go duh-duh-DUH not duh-DUH-duh" Toru groaned, pulling his hands over his face. 

"But duh-DUH-duh goes better with the vocal lines" Ryota argued back, tired of this back and forth he had been having with his best friend. The sound check had gone nowhere since Toru kept criticising his bass playing. 

"Can we do this later?" Taka groaned, sitting down beside Tomoya, bored as the two men were wasting everyone's time. They were meant to be checking sound levels and the like, not fighting over how the song should go. 

One of the sound mixers agreed, requesting a 15 minute smoke break. 

Toru glared at Ryota, excusing himself to also have a smoke break. 

Ryota sighed, defeated as he made eye contact with the vocalist. Nodding his head slightly, Taka knew that signal and got up to follow Ryota to the nearest supply closet. 

"He's pisisng me off" Ryota said as soon as they were alone. 

"I know, forget about him. He's wasting all our time" Taka murmured, beginning to pull at Ryota's belt and removing his pants. 

Ryota smiled down at the vocalist before roughly removing his jeans and shoving him against the wall. Gripping his hips, he pushed himself into Taka immediately, listening to Taka's screams and moans as he adjusted. 

Taka felt the sweat dripping on his face, the hungry kisses from Ryota, tongues smashing together as they both enjoyed the heated moment between them. The stress from earlier, the exhaustion from touring, all melted away for at least a few moments. All Taka cared about was having Ryota inside of him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer for even more rough kisses. 

Ryota grabbed Taka's hips, pulled them closer to his own, shoving himself in repeatedly. He knew Taka's hips would be painful and bruised tomorrow, but he didn't care. All he wanted was to make Taka feel good, help relieve his stress as they both screamed out, breathlessly chanting each other's names between passionate kisses. 

Taka was the first to finish. Cradling his nose into Ryota's shoulder as the other man continued thrusting. Squeezing his fingers around the other's shirt, feeling like he had reached heaven with each additional thrust until Ryota came next, resting his head against the wall behind Taka as they both tried to catch their breath. 

Taka's legs were a bit shaky as Ryota placed him back on the floor. Resting between Ryota and the wall, he placed his head on Ryota's chest while wrapping his arms around Ryota's waist. They were both drenched in sweat, but it was comfortable. The feeling of being safe in Ryota's arms was a feeling that Taka wanted to relish in, even for just a moment. 

Ryota pulled Taka closer to him, kissed his forehead softly as they both sat in silence. Their heavy breathing the only sound in the closet, it was as if they were both trapped in their own world of post-coital bliss. Ryota sighed as he looked at his watch, 5 minutes remaining, "I don't really wanna go back out there, wish we could stay like this" 

Taka laughed nervously. He could feel his ears turning red, his heartbeat quickened as he realised he agreed. His favourite part of sex was when they cuddled together afterwards. Mind doing overtime to try and figure out what that meant. Did he actually like Ryota, or did he just enjoy the closeness of being with his friend? The room was hot and sweaty, suddenly too warm for Taka's liking as he tried to scurry out of Ryota's embrace. "It's too hot in here…" 

Ryota stared, brokenhearted as Taka quickly put on his clothes then hurried out of the room. Alone, by himself, once again after sex. He knew Taka didn't feel the same way, that he was only in it for the sex, but it still stung everytime this happened. Maybe if he had never brought up how much he enjoyed being with Taka this wouldn't have happened. Taka would still be here, between his arms, nuzzling into his shoulder. 

Pulling his hand over his face, Ryota groaned loudly and rested his back against the wall. He had kept his feelings hidden for so long, why had he gone and opened his mouth. It was dumb, and all he wanted was to turn back time and enjoy the moment again. Before he had possibly scared Taka off forever. 

\---

Taka stared at the window from across the room. Laying on Ryota's chest, listening to his heart beat as they were both drifting off into slumber. He wondered when this started. They were both too exhausted after the concert to have sex, but still felt comfortable enough with each other to cuddle as they fell asleep. 

He had never even been a fan of cuddling before. Leaving immediately afterwards was Taka's preferred style, preventing girls from getting attached to him. But with Ryota, something felt different. Unsure if it was because there was nowhere else to go, maybe if they had started sleeping with each other in their homes it'd be different. 

But maybe it was Ryota who was different. 

Ryota was the first person he slept with that he truly didn't want to hurt. Everyone else could come and go as they wished, Taka didn't care. But Ryota made him want to cuddle. Made him want to fall asleep, still tangled together. Taka wanted to wake up beside Ryota the next day and stay in bed all day. 

Looking at the man underneath him, the way his hair would be splayed on the pillowcase. Taka smiled, Ryota was his whole world. And it terrified him. 

Ryota was woken up gently as Taka rested his head on his chest. Smiling to himself, he pulled Taka closer to him, into a tight hug. Feeling Taka rest his forehead against his own, they both laughed for no reason. Just smiling, enjoying each other. Slowly, their lips connected into a gentle kiss. 

Taka placed his hands on Ryota's cheeks, the soft kiss a welcome distraction from his suffocating thoughts. Ryota's hands warm on his bare back, fingertips digging into the skin. Gently, he felt himself being rolled onto his back, Ryota's kissing getting stronger, but the touches just as gentle. The plush sheets warm around him, and Ryota on top of him, Taka felt himself falling harder and harder for the man. Feeling Ryota enter him, he threw his head back onto the soft pillow. Everything felt right. Being in a hotel room, surrounded by Ryota. He wished every night could be like this, wished he could confess.

But he couldn't. 

Trying to push the feelings that were developing, swelling his chest and threatening to eat him alive. Staring up at Ryota, Taka was overcome with infatuation as they grinded against each other, helplessly moaning each other's names. His feelings getting tangled up, curling together just like their legs. He barely knew where he ended and Ryota began, both physically and emotionally. 

Ryota knew Taka's body like the back of his hand. Knew all the places Taka enjoyed being touched, kissed, everything about it. But something about tonight felt different. Maybe it was because he was still exhausted, it was who-knows-what time in the morning. Maybe he had scared off Taka earlier. But something about Taka felt different. He was needier, cuddlier, desperate for more physical contact. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there was no need to complain. This was the best sex he had had with the other man, the sensation of the blankets warm and surrounding him, Taka's fingers drawing down his back. He knew it was wrong, but it felt real. Like after all these years of Taka being distant, finally he was completely there. Right in front of Ryota, in his grasp. 

Taka moaned loudly as he tumbled into orgasm, staring at the other man as they both finished. Immediately, Taka then wrapped his arms around Ryota tighter, kissing him ferociously, wanting to ride out the high longer. 

Ryota giggled along, smiling as they continued kissing and cuddling. His heart felt like it was doing overdrive, the closeness from Taka as well as the orgasm. When they both finally caught up with their breathing, Taka gripped onto his waist even tighter, resting his head on Ryota's chest. Ryota gently brushed his hair, kissed his forehead, then closed his eyes as sleep overtook him. 

Taka looked up quietly, noticing Ryota had gone back to sleep. Resting his head back on the sleeping man's chest, he felt a tear run down his cheek. He had it bad for Ryota, and he knew he could never do anything about it. Too afraid of rejection, or further complicating their precarious relationship. So he bottled up his feelings, just as he always did. 

\---

Ryota smiled at the pretty brunette in front of him. A friend of a friend, they had just been introduced while on tour. Butterflies in his stomach started forming, excited as they exchanged phone numbers and made plans to go out for dinner the next day. Turning back towards the studio, he made brief eye contact with Taka who had also been introduced, and heard their dinner plans. 

Taka felt a pit in his stomach grow. He knew one day, one of them would find someone else. Hiding back tears as he thought of all the years they had spent together, he didn't realise the day would actually come. In the back of his mind, part of him did always hope that they'd make things more serious. One of them would confess, they'd move on from being fuck buddies and be in a proper relationship. 

Instead, he was now sitting in the dressing room. Watching the love of his life texting someone else with a huge grin on his face. They had barely talked for 10 minutes, but Taka felt like a third wheel the entire time. Conversation flowed naturally between the two of them, and Ryota looked so happy and free. Resting his head on a pillow, he knew there was no way this was gonna end well for him. 

\---

"So Ryota, how was your date?" Toru teased as Ryota walked into the hotel room the other three were in. 

"I wouldn't classify it as a date…." Ryota mumbled nervously, avoiding Taka's harsh eye contact. It was hard. He loved Taka so much, but he knew deep down it would never lead anywhere. Taka wasn't interested in him the same way he was. It would never work out. 

Taka turned onto his back, staring at the ceiling. Cursing himself for letting the other two into his hotel room to wait for Ryota. He didn't want to hear any of the details currently being given by Ryota. Knowing he was out with someone else was bad enough, he didn't really need all the details. 

Pretending to fall asleep, all Taka could do was hope the other 3 got the hint that he was exhausted and would leave. The three of them could all go to Toru and Tomoya's room for all he cared, he just needed to be left alone with his thoughts. When they finally got the hint, Taka could vaguely hear them saying good night, followed by the door closing behind him. Getting himself under control as footsteps made their way to the other side of the bed. 

"It wasn't a date" Ryota murmured, getting into the bed beside Taka and wrapping his arm around his waist. 

Taka turned his head to face Ryota, resting their heads together on the pillow. "It's ok, you don't have to lie"

"It's not a lie" Ryota insisted, reaching out and connecting their lips. 

Being pushed on his back, Taka pulled on Ryota's hair. Quickly, desperate for a sense of normalcy after waiting all day, Taka immediately pulled off Ryota's shirt. Flipping Ryota onto his back, a battle for control as clothes were discarded, the forgotten casualties of the war. 

Taka took no chances. He wanted control of Ryota, and spread the other's legs as soon as he was on top. Biting down on Ryota's lips, biting his neck as he pushed himself in. The feeling of Ryota's nails digging into his back stung, but not nearly as bad as the stinging in his heart. The knowledge that Ryota had someone else. 

Ryota moaned and groaned, Taka being possessive during sex was a rarity. It was welcome, part of him even wondered if Taka was jealous. It screamed wrong, but part of him had hoped Taka would be jealous. All he wanted was Taka to want him back, the same way Ryota wanted him. Needed him as more than just a fuck. 

Taka let out a yelp as Ryota bit his lip back, glaring down at the other man. Something took hold of him, whether it was jealousy or rage or lust, Taka placed his hand on Ryota's neck. Made eye contact with him, then pushed down onto it. Afraid of hurting him, but still wanting to feel powerful, Taka pushed harder. Just for a few seconds, until he felt satisfied. Then scooped down, kissing the area he had just pushed down on.

Ryota caught up with his breathing, staring up at Taka's darkened eyes. They weren't the usual soft and caring eyes, they looked angry. Or jealous. Ryota couldn't quite understand them. But he reached up, scooping Taka's shoulders to be on top of his own, and gave him rough kisses as they both fell into an intense orgasm. Catching his breath, he moaned as they both grinded their hips, reaching out for every last sensation. Looking up at Taka's eyes, they were back to normal, soft and gentle as they laid there under the covers in silence. There was no long conversation, acknowledgement of the date, or anything. Just Taka resting his head on his shoulder, and staring off into the distance. 

Guilt consumed Ryota with each fidget of Taka's legs. Maybe if he had never gone on the date, never planned another one, never told Taka of all this, he wouldn't be in this predicament. Laying in bed with the love of his love, and absolutely nothing to say to each other. Like a relationship breaking in front of his very eyes, he didn't want anything to change. He wanted Taka, and Taka alone. But he knew Taka didn't want that, and he had to accept that. 

\---  
Taka browsed his phone, getting comfortable on the worn down couch backstage. Having just left Ryota alone in a closet somewhere, he was still slightly sweaty and uncomfortable. Ryota walked in, making eye contact with Taka then going to sit next to Tomoya at a wall lined with mirrors. 

"So Ryota, when do you see the girlfriend next?" Toru laughed as soon as his friend walked into the room. 

"Eh?" Tomoya reacted, slapping Ryota for not informing him of this information. "You never told me she was officially your girlfriend"

"Yea, it's a new development I guess" Ryota laughed nervously. Briefly, he accidentally made eye contact with Taka. Unable to discern the look in his eyes, somewhere between jealous and upset. Part of him hoped Taka was jealous, knowing Taka felt even slightly the same way he did. As much as he liked his girlfriend, he loved Taka. Always had and probably always would. 

The heavy feeling in Taka's chest was intense. Doing his best to hold back tears, he nodded and continued to try and pretend he didn't care. He shouldn't care. But every fibre of his being was begging him to run up to Ryota, nuzzle into his chest and confess. 

But he couldn't. So instead, he continued scrolling through instagram, blocking out the conversation the others were having. Gulping, wondering how it would feel tonight. Sharing a bedroom with him, probably having sex with someone else's boyfriend. It stung, and he didn't know how to make it stop. 

\---

Immediately upon entering the hotel room for the night, before Taka could even put his bags down, Ryota shoved him backwards onto the bed. Slightly taken back by the force, Taka moaned as he melted under Ryota's touch. The teeth in his neck, fingers gliding over his torso as his shirt was removed. Biting his own lip, Ryota kissing lower down his body, each kiss ran through his veins like electricity. Closing his eyes as Ryota took his cock into his mouth, Taka's fingers clenched the bedsheets. They had barely been in the room for a minute and he was already hovering near the edge with each delicate flick of Ryota's tongue. 

Just as quickly, Ryota stood up, took his own clothes off and got on top of Taka. Immediately spreading his legs and pushing in, the sound of Taka gasping filled his senses. He had been desperate for this all day, to assure Taka that nothing would change. Knowing it was an awful thing to do, but Ryota couldn't let Taka go. Not when he was so jealous of the date. He had to show Taka he was serious, serious about them. 

Taka groaned, the feeling of urgency growing deep inside of him with each thrust. Staring up at Ryota, he couldn't read him. Maybe it was best if he didn't. Didn't overthink their situation. It meant nothing to Ryota then, and it meant nothing to Ryota now. He knew deep down, that was why Ryota was ok with this. And it killed him. Being the other man, not having Ryota to himself. He just wanted things to go back to the way they were. Quick romps followed by cuddles. He would give anything to have that back with Ryota, and not have this complicated feeling inside of him. 

Ryota came just as quick as he started, taking Taka down with him as well. Gasping for breath, they both smiled at each other. 

Taka gave him a quick peck on the lips then rested on his chest, playing with the sheet in his hand. Unsure what the future would hold, but he knew right now. Right now, there was nothing he wanted more than Ryota. Pulling the blankets to cover both their bodies, he nuzzled his nose into Ryota's shoulder. An arm snaked around him, and he looked up at Ryota. Making soft eye contact, Taka smiled up at Ryota. Gently, Ryota kissed Taka's forehead, then further down and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. 

"I don't want anything to change between us" Ryota admitted, addressing the elephant in the room as he took Taka's hand in his own. 

"Then nothing will change" Taka responded. He knew things would change, they had to. But for right now, he smiled up at Ryota, gave him another kiss then wrapped his arms around his waist. Resting his head on the other man's shoulder, Taka closed his eyes. Hoping, wishing for a day when they could be together again without complications.

**Author's Note:**

> Ryotaka pulls at my heart strings so much 🤧


End file.
